Confident, Capable, and Ready: Supporting Potty Training Success at Heights Cooperative Preschool

by Taryn Kaplan

Taryn is the Director of Heights Cooperative Preschool, as well as the Early Learners and Pre-K lead teacher. They are also a proud TT of 6 nephews and 2 nieces, ranging from ages 3-8 and a former au pair and teacher to many now-successfully potty-trained humans. With years of experience in both a school and home setting guiding small children (and their grown-ups) through life’s big milestones, like the all-important art of wiping. Taryn approaches this messy, yet empowering stage with equal parts humor, patience, and practical advice.

As we prepare to welcome a new group of children this fall, we know many families are actively helping their children reach one of the most important milestones of early childhood: potty training. At Heights Cooperative Preschool, we believe that building independence in toileting is not only a practical skill but also an important step in helping children feel confident, capable, and ready for preschool success.

Potty training can feel overwhelming at times, but it is a process that becomes much more manageable with support, consistency, and clear expectations. This blog post is designed to offer encouragement and practical resources to help your child master toileting independence and start the school year feeling proud of their abilities.

Our School’s Potty Training Expectations
At Heights Cooperative Preschool, all children must be fully potty trained prior to starting school. This means your child should be able to:

• Recognize when they need to use the bathroom.
• Communicate this need to an adult.
• Use the toilet independently without prompting.
• Complete all toileting steps independently, including wiping, flushing, pulling up clothing, and washing hands.

While our teachers provide gentle reminders, encouragement, and supervision, they do not assist children with wiping or toileting tasks. This policy helps us maintain a clean and healthy environment, clear boundaries for staff and children and supports children in developing independence and responsibility for their bodies.

To help children succeed, our classes take frequent bathroom breaks throughout the day and children may also request to use the bathroom at any time. These scheduled opportunities help children build routine and stay attuned to their bodily cues. However, even with these breaks, children must be able to manage their own toileting needs during these times.

Helping Children Master Wiping: Practical Tools and Playful Strategies

We understand that wiping can often be the most challenging part of potty independence. It requires coordination, flexibility, and body awareness. Skills that young children need time and practice to develop. Here are two playful, effective techniques to help build confidence and competence.

1. The Sticker Trick (Over Pants Practice) 
This activity helps children learn the motion and reach required for effective wiping.

• Place several small stickers on the back of your child’s pants where they would need to wipe.
• Encourage your child to reach behind and “wipe off” each sticker using their hand.
• This builds body awareness, flexibility, and the muscle memory needed for wiping.

Children often find this activity playful and silly, making practice feel less like work and more like a fun challenge.

2. The Balloon and Wet Wipe Trick 
This hands-on activity offers immediate feedback on technique and thoroughness.

• Inflate two balloons and tape them together on the back of the seat of a chair.
• Have your child sit on the chair with the balloons positioned behind them, mimicking the toilet position. 
• Place a small smear of peanut butter or another substance with a similar sticky consistency (such as sun butter or lotion) between the two balloons.
• Provide a wet wipe (not toilet paper) and encourage them to wipe the substance clean.
• This practice helps children understand the importance of reaching properly and wiping until the area is clean.
• Visit this link to see this trick in action.

This activity works well because it turns an abstract concept into something children can see and understand right away. It helps build both confidence and the muscle memory needed for thorough, independent wiping.

Occupational therapists and early childhood experts recommend activities like this because they support coordination, reach, and awareness through hands-on, playful learning.

Using the Right Words: Building Confidence, Safety, and Clear Communication

At Heights Cooperative Preschool, we encourage families to help their children build confidence and body autonomy by using correct biological terms for body parts; words like penis, vulva, and anus (butt or bottom). These words help children communicate clearly and confidently about their bodies with trusted adults, including teachers and healthcare providers.

Using the proper terms for your child's anatomy supports body awareness, healthy boundaries, and clear communication. It helps reduce confusion and ensures teachers and caregivers understand your child when they talk about their body. While some families may use nicknames at home, it’s important to know that your child’s teacher may not recognize or understand those nicknames.
At school, the words we use consistently across all classrooms are:

• Penis
• Vulva (when referring to external anatomy ) 
• Vagina (when referring internal anatomy)
• Butt or Bottom

These words are age-appropriate, accurate, and commonly understood by both children and adults. Using them helps children feel comfortable and confident talking about their bodies and ensures consistency between home and school.
We are intentional in distinguishing between vulva and vagina to help children understand their bodies with accuracy: the vulva refers to external anatomy, while the vagina refers to internal anatomy.
This clarity becomes especially important when children are learning how to wipe properly or when they need to communicate with a teacher about discomfort, pain, or bodily functions.

When children have the language to describe what they are feeling;  for example, "My butt feels sore after I go potty” or “My vulva hurts when I wipe", teachers are better able to understand their needs and respond appropriately. Having clear, accurate words empowers children to communicate confidently about their bodies and helps ensure they receive the care and support they need without confusion.
Additionally, research shows that children who are taught the correct anatomical terms for their bodies are better equipped to clearly report if something inappropriate happens to them. Accurate language supports children’s safety, strengthens their ability to communicate clearly, and provides a foundation for healthy boundaries and body autonomy.

Helpful Resources for Families
Here are some resources to guide and support you through this important milestone:

• Oh Crap! Potty Training by Jamie Glowacki – A well-regarded, practical guide that walks parents through every stage of potty learning.
• Incorporating familiar characters into potty training can make the process more engaging. Consider shows with episodes and songs. Use this link for a list of shows with potty training episodes.  
• Visual Toileting Schedules – Step-by-step charts that help children remember the toileting process. These are especially helpful when posted in the bathroom as part of your home routine.
• Books can help young children visualize expectations and reduce anxiety. Consider adding the following to your library :
  • Potty by Leslie Patricelli
  • Even Firefighters go to the Potty by Wendy Wax
  • Daniel Goes to the Potty   by Maggie Testa

You Are Not Alone, We’re Here to Support You
Every child approaches potty training on their own timeline. Some master it quickly, while others need more time, practice, and encouragement. Both paths are completely normal. At Heights Cooperative Preschool, we are committed to helping families build confidence, independence, and healthy routines.

We also want families to know that we recognize accidents can still happen even for children who are fully potty trained. This is why we require all children to have a full change of clothes that stays in their cubby at school at all times. Having these extra clothes on hand helps ensure that your child can comfortably and confidently get back to their day without added stress or embarrassment.

If your child ever needs assistance with changing clothes due to an accident, they will be helped by Mx. Taryn or Ms. Margie. We approach these situations with kindness, patience, and respect for each child’s dignity and comfort.

We also understand that every family’s potty training journey looks different. Medical exceptions or accommodations may be made on a case-by-case basis in partnership with families and healthcare providers. If you anticipate your child needing support beyond our general policy, we invite you to reach out so we can collaborate on a plan that sets them up for success.
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At Heights Cooperative Preschool, we see toileting independence as a big step on your child’s journey toward confidence and belonging in our school community. I’m always happy to chat with families about strategies, resources, or simply to remind you that you’re doing a great job. If you have questions, need guidance, or would like to talk through strategies, please reach out. We are happy to support you through this important milestone and help ensure your child starts the school year feeling proud, capable, and ready for success.
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Here’s to all the big (and small) milestones ahead!